getting away

i mentioned this many many many times before.
i really can't stand here. not that patriotic after all.
there's some part of me that doesn't want to leave and
a bigger part of me that wants to get out of here so badly.
maybe the dramas are influencing me... but i guess not...
had this thought very long ago.
of course there are people and things i cant let go of,
but i cant help but feel like i'm trapped here.
maybe other countries are even more fast paced than it is here,
but at least i dont feel that way if i just get out of here now.



~~~

my grandma just went back to malaysia today.
i cant help but always feel like what i'm feeling now 
everytime my relatives come visit and go.